Ramblings of a nicotine-deprived mind...

So it has been approximately seven days, seven hours, and 55 minutes since my last cigarette... but who's counting?

Fuck you, cigarettes. No, seriously, fuck you.

I AM, DAMMIT. I need every bit of affirmation I can muster. Side note: while trying to check the time I took the above photo so I could have an exact quitting time, I discovered that iPhones DON'T REPORT PHOTO TIMESTAMPS. What the hell, y'all? So I actually had to download some weird geek app that somehow scrounges up all the technical details about iPhone photos, just so I could have my precise starting point. It's the little things.

I don't have much to say about this right now... I haven't even told anyone other than my coworkers yet, because I don't want to get people (read: Mom) all excited, then have to feel even worse if I fail and fall off the wagon. I'll talk more about it later, once I'm not teetering so close to the edge.

I do, however, want to document the reward schedule I've laid out for myself, just for motivational purposes. I decided to make it makeup/pampering-type things, so I can at least feel pretty while I'm toughing this shit out.

• ONE WEEK: TokyoMilk Lip Elixirs (already ordered three of these a few hours ago, so Reward #1 is en route).

• TWO WEEKS: BH Cosmetics "Galaxy Chic" eyeshadow palette, so I can have some pretty shades to color on myself with.  Idle hands smoke cigarettes, ya know. The packaging looks like a nine-year-old designed it, so I'll have to hide it from public view, but the colors are gorgeous.

• THREE WEEKS: Buxom Full-On Lip Polish. I received a sample of this from my Ipsy subscription and just love it, so I'll be needing a full-sized one even though it's way more than I should really spend on a silly lip gloss.

• ONE MONTH: Skyn Iceland skincare products. I tried some samples from this line and am very impressed with how great my skin feels, but it is EXPENSIVE AS SHIT (in my opinion, at least). So I figure I'll have earned a big splurge at the month mark, right? And I'm really trying to find some anti-aging products that I like, because I'd rather prevent that shit before it starts. I want to keep people surprised by how old I am, and guessing a decade less than my true age, for a loooooooooong time.

And no, I really don't need any of this stuff, because I've already gone a bit overboard with my newfound cosmetics obsession, but I figure the cost will be covered by what I would otherwise have spent on cigarettes, right? And after I'm done with my little rewards program, some "cigarette money" will go into my vacation jar each week, and the rest will stay in the bank where it belongs.

The battle continues...